Cod Almighty | Article

by Steve Meek

23 May 2016

BBC Radio Humberside asked Steve to go on air and perform a poem to mark Town's return to the Football League. When it was all over, he was good enough to share it with us too.

England's a land of a million faces
Villages, cities and strange unknown places
We travelled the breadth of this heartbreaking land
To play plucky part-timers with twenty-six fans.
Their left-back's a plumber. Their right-back's the mayor
The centre-half used to cut Chris Waddle's hair
The goalie's stepbrother is Wayne Rooney's dad
We'd win, but I'd still go home sad.

The pitch is more suited to carrots and leeks
The meat pies are fragile. The coffee is weak
The locals are there for the love of the game
Their players know all the supporters by name
The football's for purists. The football is raw
The football is rugged. The football is poor
I'm suffering from aerial combat fatigue
Thank cod we are back in the league.

Six seasons it lasted. Six seasons of pain.
Now the waiting is over. We're climbing again
On the highway like Hull, the relief road to Wembley
For the world's first inflatable haddock assembly
A black and white army with no shades of grey
Fighting to keep the blue Shaymen at bay
We're saltydog seamen strong ready and able
To take back at our place at the captain's league table.