Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Friday 21 May 2004

21 May 2004

Your Guest Diarist is becalmed today: marooned by the end-of-season doldrums. Casting web glances this way and that way all morning, but everything is stale. The BBC sport page for our beloved Grimsby Town was last updated on Sunday 9 May, when the unmentionable Mr Law mentioned that there was a possibility that the club would not further retain his services after his less than sparkling performance in trying to gel a team that played cohesive, motivated football.

Clicking through to the risible BBC Humber site, one finds it inviting the reader to "get to know the 2003/2004 Grimsby Town team". The writers have obviously 'taken a view' on the variously reported ramblings of the Grimsby chairman, with regard to managerial shortlists, appointment timetables and the like, as not worth bothering with. And they could be right: this Town fan has just given up idle speculation, and is resigned to waiting for the announcement. In fact, if you've got 'inside info' then I'd rather not know it. Treat me like a Likely Lad who's avoiding the score. Maybe it's because the news is so important that I can't face it. Maybe it's because the appointment won't matter in the grand scheme of things. Actually, I haven't got a clue what to think.

Anyway some Diary readers have shaken off the end-of-season lethargy sufficiently to write in. Stalwart correspondent Keith Collins reports a sighting of the lesser spotted Gallimore thus: "So there I was parked on the seafront at Cleethorpes eating fish and chips with my dear old Mum when who should be walking along the prom but none other than Mr, Mrs, and little Galli. This got me thinking that we could do a lot worse than get him and Peter Handyside back to the club. A back four of Macca Handyside Crane (or Edwards if he re-signs) and Galli might give us some stability and experience at the back in the 3rd. This is something we haven't had for two seasons or more. Still, I suppose I can dream that we even have enough players to have a back four come the opening game!" I'm not sure that Handyside has weathered the years very well, Keith, and rumour had it he was not interested in ever coming back to us, but Gallimore's fish may well be kept in a different kettle. We'll just have to wait and see, won't we.

The ever-voluble Mark Stilton has also dropped us a line claiming to have identified why modern players are behaving so erratically when it comes to contracts and transfers. Apparently today's Guardian features the headline 4,000 Brits may have mad cow agent. There must be some bullshit joke in that, but I'll leave that to you the reader. The Red Arrows have been dive-bombing our house half the morning. Nine of the buggers. Maybe I should take a look on eBay for some ack-ack firepower. They were sort of impressive, for like five minutes, but they never even waved back once. At least Groves did that. Not that I want him back of course, but I do want a manager that smiles and waves. Don't you? See yer.