Cod Almighty | Diary
Diary - Friday 14 May 2004
14 May 2004
While some Town fans remain stoically wedged behind plant pots in seedy Lincolnshire hotels, hoping to catch sight of Mr Furneaux furtively conducting managerial interviews, a few others made a practice run for next season to Glanford Park to see the Grimsby Town first team lose the Lincs Cup final to a team representing the flower of Scunthorpe youth. The official site match reporter dashed off a hasty match report which I hereby quote verbatim: "United win 8-7 on pens. The Mariners took the lead on 57 mins, Chris Bolder rising at the far post to head home a Barnard cross from the left. Hayes put the Iron level on 74 mins, bundling the ball past substitute keeper Paul Fraser." For the conspiracy theorists the OS reported the Town starting line up as: 1. Davison, 2. Crowe, 3. Barnard, 4. Bolder, 5. Crane, 6. Ford, 7. Hockless, 8. Campbell, 10. Jevons, 9. Mansaram, 11. Anderson.
Mr Furneaux has also announced that Messrs Hockless, Rowan, Young, Mansaram and Wheeler have been offered new contracts. He has also sent a public hint, via the Town website, that they should make their minds up pretty damn quick. Given the rate at which other clubs are releasing players, I can follow his gist. The Diary reported the clanking caused by the mass shackle release at Oakwell the other day. That has been quickly followed by an even bigger mob being pushed out of the gates of the prison which is Hillsborough. The Owls released 13 players yesterday, including the obligatory ex-Town man in the form of Terry Cooke. Notts County have let nine go; Brentford have scrapped their reserve teamÂ… oh, and Veron has requested a transfer. Volatile days indeed.
So that Furneaux announcement has doubtless left many fans scratching their heads as to the wisdom of offering Flash a chance to continue his professional football career. They say his confidence is knocked; that he needs basic coaching; that he needs to gain weight; to get fit; the advice is seemingly endless. Well, as my old Dad would have said, "He bloody needs summat, mate!" Rowan, meantime, skulks on, glad that Mansaram is taking all the heat. The conspiracy theorists babble on, dissecting whether the incoming manager will have been consulted on these contracts, or whether the Town board has set up a fait accompli - they are cheap and they are signed. Work with them. Speaking personally (as one always does, actually) I couldn't possibly comment.
Normally dour Electronic Fishcake reporter Rob Sedgwick has published a piece excitedly claiming that if Bradford go bust and/or Wimbledon don't do a deal with the taxman, then Town won't be relegated. He ends with the statement: "This has not been confirmed with the Football league." League Rule 12.4 explains that when a club drops out of Divisions One or Two during the close season it will be replaced by an extra club being promoted from the lower division. So it's the likes of Huddersfield and Bristol City who should be excited, I'm afraid, Rob. Glad to see that you have such empathy with the Valley Parade fans anyway, mate.
As regular readers will know, your Guest Diarist lives in deepest south Lincolnshire. But that doesn't stop him being accosted by QPR fans during his morning constitutional with the dog. "I bet you're sick!" he grinned. "So how come you support QPR anyway?" I asked this born-and-bred yellowbelly. "Ah," he muttered, "they asked me who I supported at school when I was a nipper, and I didn't know. So I read the paper that night and picked the team with the longest name." As you do, as you do. Well, it's been a long sad week, gentle readers; keep smiling, and keep praying for that miracle - whatever you think that it should be. I'm so punch-drunk I can't even think of one to ask for. See yer.