Cod Almighty | Diary

Something wicked this way comes

7 June 2024

Well there we are, typical. Your Deviant Diary had hand crafted 619 words of beauty and precision creating a delightful diversion from the dying days of the working week. A dollop of Shakespeare here, a hint of Cliff and the Shads there, and a surprise allusion to Brian Brain’s dibbly-dobblers that nipped both ways. Don't you miss the long days of summers yore, sat at home watching a second round B&H cup match live from Hove and introduced by Captain Peter West. Well played sir!

And then a newspaper dropped through the letter box.

He's done it again, he's done it again! Chipper Stockwood's popped up at the back post to change the game and cause a swift rewrite of this stocking filler – there's only so many words to wrangle out of announcing a pre-season friendly at York. Yep, it's another one of his Guardian articles.

What's he on about now? The Football Regulator. Yawning are you? Get a grip man (and woman), sort it readers! The continued dither and delay is the existential threat to football, to life, to our communities, that's what. You can't keep politics out of football because football is life. The Premier League is the acme, the epitome of the neo-liberal hegemony - raw capitalism at its rawest, that self-defeating Darwinist hoovering of power and wealth.

Pop ate itself years ago, football's doing it now, right in front of our eyes, treating the real humans who turn up as mere dots. Well, join the dots mate, we're all connected. There is such thing a as society. Drippy Rishi and Careful Keir, like Santa Claus, are coming to town next week and (ex)Chairman Wow wants them to grasp the nettle and Save Our Game to Save Our Country, for there's a great big hole in every EFL club's financial bucket and it's getting bigger all the time. The dam's gonna burst soon unless someone fixes it pronto.

Town may be a model club these days but we're not immune, we're not an island, we're just another dot that makes up a bigger picture. Hyperbole? Speculation? Oh, no, not at all, we only deal in facts here. The second part of Chipper Stockwood's interview will be published next Wednesday. Now that is a fact.

We're a rich country with the richest football league in the world. So why is everything crumbling? Those who hold the wealth only seek to connect when they want to keep what they've got. Not every rich man of course, just most.

Remember there is always an alternative. There are always choices. You chose to carry on reading this and where did that lead?

To the end, there is always an end. All things end in the end.

This is the end.