Cod Almighty | Diary

A Fleet of Thanks: The Boats of Blundell Park

19 March 2025

It's not every day you hear a football manager mention that a fan has been sending him carefully modelled boats. But that's exactly what David Artell revealed in a recent chat with BBC Radio Humberside. Somewhere out there, a dedicated supporter has taken the time to craft these miniature vessels and send them to the Mariners' boss. A small but thoughtful gesture—one that, in an era of social media meltdowns and half-time booing, reminds us there's still kindness in football.
Of course, this had me thinking. If other players at Blundell Park were to receive a model boat that reflected their on-pitch performances, what would they get?

Kieran Green – The Banana Boat
A banana boat looks like pure chaos – bouncing around, threatening to throw everyone overboard. But look closer, and there's method in the madness. That's Kieran Green. He charges about, seemingly on the edge of disaster, but then produces a brilliant pass, assist, or goal. Unpredictable but thrilling.

Curtis Thompson – The Survival Raft
Nothing fancy, no frills—just there when you need it most. That was Curtis Thompson last season: arriving mid-season, hauling us to safety, and keeping our heads above water. But survival rafts are only good short term. This season, the seams have started to split, and the leaks are showing.

Jordan Davies – The Titanic
Great fanfare, grand arrival…and then straight into trouble. A couple of appearances, a few training-ground sightings, and before you know it, he's out injured. If the Titanic had icebergs to contend with, Jordan Davies has had a North Sea of injury problems. And just like that great ship, all we can do is gaze back at what might have been.

Jayden Luker – The Kayak
Sleek, streamlined, and effortlessly weaving through defences. Jayden Luker glides past opponents like a well-handled kayak zipping through rapids. All he needs now is a paddle – or, in his case, a bit more experience – to keep steering himself in the right direction.

Cameron McJannet – The Trawler
Solid, dependable, and always in the right place to haul out loose balls. McJannet isn't here for glamour; he's here to do the dirty work. Like any good trawler, he sweeps up what's needed, brings it in safely, and then offloads it (to the midfield, not the fish market). It's not always flashy, but without him, the whole operation could sink.

Géza Dávid Turi – The Luxury Cruise Liner
A ship of elegance and class, built for poise rather than brute force. Turi is the latest addition to the Mariners' fleet, and if his early performances are anything to go by, he's a composed, classy presence in midfield. If he truly is the Faroese Sergio Busquets, let's hope this cruise lasts years rather than just a short, scenic trip.

Denver Hume – The Container Ship
Not because of his size, but because he constantly delivers. Most assists in the league, most chances created – Hume is Grimsby's go-to provider. Others get the plaudits for finishing moves, but he's the one making sure they've got the goods in the first place.

Dave Moore – The Galleon
A ship from another era, yet still one of the most revered in the fleet. Dave Moore has been a part of Grimsby Town for so long, you half expect his medical bag to contain leeches and brandy! But soon the galleon will dock for the last time. When he retires at the end of the season, he'll leave a legacy few could match. The seas of Blundell Park won't be the same without him.

Former Mariners – The Magaluf Party Boat
Of course, in years gone by, there would have been plenty of other vessels we could have handed out. The Magaluf Party Boat? Conlon, Gallimore and, more recently, McAtee would have been boarding that one before you could say "one more drink."

But for now, we'll keep our fleet sailing as it is – steady, structured, and hopefully charting a course towards the play-off horizon. With a bit of luck and a fair wind, this squad might just navigate its way to a thrilling end to the season. And we should send our anonymous boat-building fan a message of thanks – for reminding us that, beneath all the ups and downs, it's the small things that make football special.